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| JagranCityPlus / Parenting
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Help your child in developing a strong personality
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In this era of tough competition in each field when our children grow up they should possess a dynamic personality to achieve success. Personality of a child develops as a very natural process, which can be further improved by proper guidance of parents and teachers. A personality is made up of one's physical traits, intellectual qualities, attitude, behaviour pattern, feelings and aspirations, commitments and convictions. How a child's personality will develop to a great extent, depends upon the way he is allowed to socialise, interact with others emotionally during his childhood, the parent's behaviour with the child, how the child is treated by his near and dear ones, the cultural milieu in which the child is brought up, the amount of care and love he gets from parents, the contribution made by the school and avenues provided to the child for his physical growth and mental development.
Tips on personality development:
o Do not scold child all the time for minor failures.
o Do not trouble the child constantly by nagging.
o Frequent use of bitter or harsh remarks should be avoided.
o Avoid the practice of preferring one child over the other and thereby neglecting the other.
o Do not compare your child with any other sibling or any other child.
o Avoid prolonged separation from the child.
o Constant friction with the child or between the parents should not be expressed in front of the child.
o Never discourage the child.
o Do not praise your child always; there should be a balance between praising and pointing mistakes.
o Excessive discipline is also harmful (Explain the child the consequences of his action rather than scolding him / her always. (e.g. if a child is playing with scissor then instead of just saying no, tell the child that scissor is used to cut paper so bring a paper and let me help you in cutting the paper.)
o Repetitive or severe punishment should be avoided. The child should be given a chance to rectify himself and punishment should be the last resort.
o Parents should not be over ambitious regarding their children and they should not set goals for a child, which are not in harmony with his intellectual endowment capabilities, achievements and interests. This also puts a breach in the proper development of the child's personality.
o Give your child the liberty to take small decisions on his own (e.g. give him a choice of selecting his clothes when you are buying new clothes for him.)
o Avoid over parenting.
Over parenting occurs when parents solve children's problems rather than give them the chance to overcome problems themselves. (e.g. if a child has been beaten by another child in school then instead of you going and solving his problem, explain him to be strong enough to go and complain the teacher himself.)
o Always answer your child's queries even at midnight. As a parent you should be the first one to answer all his queries because if you won't then your child might ask somebody else and this can cause a dangerous situation when your child reaches his teenage he is going to look for answers elsewhere, rather than asking you.
—Komal P Desai |
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